Mark O’Meara: the blog

Lesson for the day - it would have been a good deal simpler if a snake had bitten big bird.

Only a few months ago I weighed in at 96.5 kilograms which was not the heaviest I had been but wasn’t far off either. I think our change to mostly homecooked meals helped me lose some weight and being sick knocked some more off which brings me to the 87.5 that I am now.

While I don’t have a firm plan I figure I’ll see if I can manage to get down to seventy something and see how fat I look then. Not that I am fussed about looking fat as such if truth me told. But it would be nice to go to the doctor and not have to discuss my weight and it would be nice to know that normal sizes of t-shirts and shirts will fit me fine.

The thing is that there are heaps of people bigger than me and I have to wonder how they all manage to find clothes in regular type shops.

In terms of strategy I have nothing sophisticated. Just walk the dogs when I can and try to resist chocolate and fizzy drink most of the time. Not all the time of course, just more days than not.

Lesson for the day - you don’t often read on the internet about men getting smaller.

I noticed, all out of the blue, that The Muppet Movie finally gets an Australian DVD release in a couple of weeks and will only be $15. The other thing I noticed was that the Indiana Jones boxset, which has been out for ages, will drop to $45 which is pretty good for three classic flicks.

And there is a rumour going about that Serenity will be out on DVD on December 20th in the States at least.

Just thought some of you might like to know.

Lesson for the day - there are worse things than fine movies.

We watched two movies this weekend and by dumb coincidence both of them were set in New Jersey. The first was called Garden State and the New Jersey it is set in is a kind of hipster paradise replete with ironic sight gags and quirky incidents left, right and centre that help you find yourself. Incidently this film has a wonderful soundtrack which is absolutely worth tracking down.

The second film is called Hysterical Blindness and was on our list because it was directed by Mira Nair (Monsoon Wedding). The main character, played by Uma Thurman, starts off a selfish loser and she ends the film exactly the same. The New Jersey of this film is harsh and depressing. There is happiness there but easily found and certainly not for her.

This second film was well made but was tough to watch just because the central character makes such a hash of her life. In contrast Garden State is fun to watch and any angst felt is framed in friendly hipster tones which makes it all good fun.

Lesson for the day - a place, like an actor, can be more than one character.

Well Zelda and Finn made it into the Sunday Herald Sun today. I think Zelda is expecting a book deal any time now but is perhaps being a little hopeful.

And in real life Zelda would never let a toddler this close. What you can’t see is Nicky holding her for dear life to the left.

Lesson for the day - believe half of what you see.

The second photographer turned up today shortly after Finn woke up and wanted to get a photo of Zelda and Finn. I can see their angle, there’s not much cuter than a poor pusscat and a toddler.

However Zelda is really just someone to yell at and frighten away as far as Finn is concerned and I don’t think Zelda sees any value at all in Finn. So it was never going to go well.

But the photographer was quite determined and wanted to try evey trick she knew to get the two of them together. So we tried many of these with Nicky bearing the brunt of the Zelda handling which can’t have been easy. But finally Zelda had just had enough so I hope they have a photo they can use.

Lesson for the day - not everyone is prepared to play nice for cameras.

I recorded a podcast with Di this morning and afterwards we got to talking more generally about podcasts. The person she wants to hear more of is my Dad who I think last appeared in podcasts four and five.

Anyhow you will be able to hear the podcast with Di from perhaps Wednesday and another one with my Dad when I can actually get around to recording one.

Lesson for the day - it helps to know what people like to hear even if it is my Dad (who spends most of the time contradicting me).

A photographer will be coming out tomorrow to see Zelda for her story in the Sunday Herald-Sun.

I wonder if Time will call or email.

Lesson for the day - funnily enough it’s all the papers famous for cat-in-tree stories that are interested in the cat-bit-by-snake story.

Well Zelda has just had her first proper photo-shoot which I guess was a success. She just wanted to run away from the man with the camera but eventually she agreed to sit on the couch and be patted. So then I had to sit on the floor to be in the shot with her all the while patting her and collecting masses of white hairs.

So now she is a step closer to being famous and about half a kilo lighter.

Lesson for the day - it’s not as easy as it looks being a celebrity handler.

As a child I was known only for being stupid and like many other teenagers I was completely unable to engage at all successfully with people socially. However as an adult, and it’s been a few years now, I am pretty good at being friendly and engaging with people. I may not form instant bonds that last a lifetime but as a rule I get along with people well enough.

But of recent times I have noticed that I seem to pretty comprehensively fail to connect with people. I would feel better if I could say it was them but it really isn’t. Since I have noticed how socially awkward I am I have also noticed how many people are really very friendly and seem quite determined to connect in some fashion, bless their little cotton socks.

I guess it’s not surprising that I suck at this since I only have a couple of hours of conversation each week with people over two. I am not surprised about being rusty but the whole experience can be very discouraging and if anything puts me off even trying to be social.

Of course a good dose of people will help and I am sure that my three weeks of rounds and then another nine weeks next year will help me get back into the swing of being a person but it really can’t happen too soon for my liking. With any luck I will bounce back entirely once I am working again in February 2007.

Lesson for the day - if you get to choose then being socially adept is the way to go.